Kansas City Restore Sanity Reportage

NOTICE: I used the word "reportage" in the title because I'm an Intellectual Elitist who has no patience with "common, everyday Americans" who can't be bothered to expand their limited fucking vocabularies by going to the trouble of Googling new words.

So I had to leave the house today anyway to go into work to finish up some system testing.

As long as I was wearing grown up clothes and out amongst humanity, I figured I may as well go to the Kansas City Satellite Rally To Restore Sanity on The Plaza.

The second thing I noticed when I got there (after the anticipated low turn out...it was more of a nanosatellite rally) was the Po Po!


Apparently, before I arrived there had been a bit of a dust-up, if not an actual kerfuffle teetering dangerously close to an all out brouhaha!

It seems that while the Restore Sanity folks had gone through all of the proper Kansas City Parks and Recreation channels to get the required permit for their event (where they were told they COULD NOT use loudspeakers or any other voice amplification devices...a requirement they complied with), some rogue Tea Baggers showed up WITHOUT a permit and WITH a sound system to mount a counter-rally!





That woman creeped me out a bit. Looked like a Mormon sister-wife.

The Tea Bagger turn out was WAY smaller then the Sane people. It looked like the Tea Bagger speakers and their audience all rode together in the same van.

So I kind of eavesdropped on a conversation between the Po Po and some of the folks from both sides. The police were saying something about no actual law being broken while the Tea Bagging lady was saying

"But we DO have a permit! From God! It's called the Constitution!"

which she then brandished a copy of to the cop who seemed unimpressed.



Later, the police got bored and managed to find the only African-American on The Plaza to interrogate, much to their obvious delight.



The only News Crew on sight was from KSHB. I'll leave it up to you to figure out how I noticed their presence.




Yeah, I'd tap that.

I was only there for a few minutes when I saw my good friend and fellow blogger Average Jane who was giving out Free Hugs!



This was her sign...



That was typical of most of the signs I saw. Level headed, intelligent, rational, non-confrontational and inclusive.















Some of the signs were a bit more confrontational, but barely...









That last one may seem to be the most aggressive, but he's a gutless moderate next to my "Eat The Rich" campaign.



There were some Stephen Colbert supporters who infiltrated the rally in an attempt to Keep Fear Alive...









But these were my favorites...













After the rally I had a nice lunch with Average Jane and her friend Lisa at The Cheesecake Factory.

Nice day!

This Is Why America Is Doomed

Language guru: Obama speech too 'professorial' for his target audience

By the CNN Wire Staff
June 17, 2010 10:23 a.m. EDT

"(CNN) -- President Obama's speech on the gulf oil disaster may have gone over the heads of many in his audience, according to an analysis of the 18-minute talk released Wednesday.

Tuesday night's speech from the Oval Office of the White House was written to a 9.8 grade level, said Paul J.J. Payack, president of Global Language Monitor. The Austin, Texas-based company analyzes and catalogues trends in word usage and word choice and their impact on culture.

Though the president used slightly less than four sentences per paragraph, his 19.8 words per sentence "added some difficulty for his target audience," Payack said."

That's right. The President's speech was dumbed down to the level a 15 year old high school freshman should be able to grasp, and it was still too complicated for the average American to comprehend.

Put another way, the average American is a fucking idiot! The average American has the intellectual capacity and critical thinking skills of a 14 year old.

This is why George W. Bush was so popular with "average Americans". He didn't have to "dumb down" his speeches for them. He was already there.

How in the fuck can we be trusted with civilian control over the mightiest military force the planet has ever seen when the average American thinks fart jokes are the pinnacle of comedic creativity and giggles uncontrollably when they hear the word "boob"?

This is why the Indians and the Chinese are going to rocket past us on the world stage like a cheetah passing a slug.

Because the average American is cowering in their root cellar, listening to Glenn Beck on battery powered radios, desperately clinging to guns and religion (Obama was right about that), stockpiling gold, ready to shoot their neighbor at the drop of a hat because the world seems so scary and complicated. They don't understand what's going on in the world.

Why?

Because they're fucking stupid.

This country was founded by intellectual giants! Philosophers, scientists, theologians, doctors, lawyers, agriculturalists, political theorists, men of extraordinary intelligence with deep critical and analytical skills.



But this country has been inherited by people like this.



As sad as it is, I think the smartest person in that video is the hayseed reporting the Big Foot sighting. The Deputy Sheriff investigating it as an actual "incident" and the reporters covering it as actual "news" are even bigger fucking idiots than that dumb hick who claimed to see it.

He probably had a real good chuckle over that later when he was fucking his rooster.

Not to put to fine a point on it, but everyone in that video can procreate and vote.

We're fucked.