Rewriting Ad Copy

An ex girlfriend, like most of my ex girlfriends, became a lifelong good friend (so much better in so many ways).

Her parents have a very nice mobile home. They are wanting to sell it and move to a maintenance free rental. Ya know. Like me. I'm such a trend setter!

They don't have computers or digital cameras or internet access. But someone told them there was a web site where they could "sell their mobile home on the internet".

So I'm trying to help them out. My ex gf's sister wrote an ad for their them. Here it is.

"16 x 80 mobile home for sale. 2 bedrooms, 2 baths. Master bedroom has separate master bath with double vanity, shower & new jacuzzi. Second full bath has new bathtub and shower. Large kitchen with oak cabinets + large living room. Cathedral ceilings throughout. Kitchen appliances like new. 3 outdoor sheds for storage. Privacy fence on part of lot & deck. Car port for 2 cars. New roof, siding, carpet & hot water heater. Beautiful, a must see. Call 816-XXX-XXXX."

*****

I took 10 pictures of the place and rewrote the ad, but I could use some professional second opinions.

HOME FOR SALE BY OWNER

Beautiful 1280 square foot, 2 bedroom, 2 bathroom, manufactured home with large living room and cathedral ceilings available!

FEATURES

Car Port for 2 cars



Wheelchair Accessible



Modern kitchen & appliances with lots of oak storage and central cooking island




Master bathroom has double vanity,



A shower and new jacuzzi



Second full bath has new bathtub and shower

Small, flat, easily maintainable yard with a privacy fence.



3 outdoor sheds for storage
Deck with dual fenced pet gates
New Roof
New siding
New carpet
New hot water heater

Priced to sell! Call 816-XXX-XXXX. to arrange an appointment with the owner.

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